Question by Brittanyy: How can i get my boyfriend to understand i truly love him and never want to hurt him?
I love my boyfriend but he has security issue with women. He had been hurt and abused by women in the past. I tell him i love him but I don’t know what else to do. He means the world to me and i don’t want anything to happen. I really love him and i need him to know I’d never hurt him. Please help me!

Best answer:

Answer by hi
Tell him.

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18 Responses to “How can i get my boyfriend to understand i truly love him and never want to hurt him?”

  • love:

    just be patient with him always..he is just having a hard with him and let him feel how much you love him..

  • Bill:

    Your actions will (or will not) gain his trust.

  • Karla:

    Give him the impression that you really love him and would do anything for him instead of just telling him.Think of this:What makes YOU different from the other girls?Well prove it to him.G- luck

  • ...:

    Go to medical school and then get a psychiatrist diploma. That is what it would take because a normal person cannot solve someone else’s insecurities. If your boyfriend needs help he should get counseling. You cannot solve this for him. If his issues are that bad then he should not be in a relationship and causing you this anguish.

  • John:

    Some things you can do
    Some things you can not do.

    If you Boyfriend cut his hand
    Who must heal
    Him or you?
    Him of course.

    The problem you and he share will require him to work on it to.

    Also, from experience.
    Sometimes the story one lover will tell of the past relationship is not always objective.
    In other words often problems like this are not just the girls in his life.
    some of the problem may have been his word, actions or non actions.
    It is complex.

    It is not your full responsibility
    Be sure he does not use this to CONTROL your behaviour.

    See a relationship counsellor together.

  • babygirl:

    Just be patient right now i think he knows you do but only with time will he truley believe it.
    Because you have to understand once you been hurt so many times its hard to let your
    heart open all the way up again. just be patient, that’s the key

  • heather judd:

    well i think being with him, and not cheating on him will be very helpful.
    I also think after you guys have been dating awhile he will get more into you being in love with him, and he will see that your not there to use him, or hurt him like in the past.
    I think guys arnt so mussy gussy like girls are so to them being told that you love them 500 times a day might get anoying, or telling him how much you love him y’know,
    Dont get me wrong you should tell him how you feel. but not like 500 times a day
    And you should also, stay with him. and be 100% his girl. so he knows your not ganna hurt him.
    Hope i helped :)

  • Consultant:

    There is NOTHING that you can do, he has been hurt to where trust is a big issue. It will take time to heal and it has to happen in his own time. So, the best thing to do is continue to be that trusting, loving person that he has grown to love.

  • *~Panther Moon~*:

    Tell him that and mean it. You are not the cause of his trust issues, its a personal thing with him. I would suggest that he get personal counseling for this. If he refuses then its probably best that this relationship end. You cannot have a relationship without trust.

  • msjinx39:

    All you can do is to remain faithful, do spontaneous things like something goofy, send him flowers or know make him smile. Little notes in his pocket to find….or in his car. They will be little constant reminders that you are there and you love him. You didn’t mention how long he has been jaded. Some guys take awhile to get over things. Sometimes, depending on the damage from the other relationships (not yours) that was done, he has to begin to heal that and move on. Its not all you. He needs to get over it and move forward with you. If he cannot, then maybe he needs to see how miserable life is without you. Make him miss you a little. Flirt alot, kiss him in public, go to the movies. Just have FUN! Take care, hoped this helped some!

  • no name:

    I have never been in a stituation like this but i have an idea of what you could do.
    Just sit down and tell him you dont think he knows how much you love him.
    If he doesnt act like he knows you love him he might not love you!
    So just talk with him and let him know how you feel.

  • Mittens:

    Tell him just like you said here. I think straight to the point is the best way. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

  • Zach:

    You have to tell him exactly that. “I love you and would never forgive myself if I hurt you,” but then you have to prove it through time and honesty for him to genuinely believe you.

  • GIGITY GIGITY!!!!!!!:

    buy him a car, then lock him in it.. after three days screw him up with a samuri sword, and shot him wiht one shot…. let him out, stripp him of his clothes and handcuff him to the mailbox……


  • Sydney :D:

    He’s in control of his own past, not you. Remember that. Does he love you at least? What did he see in you? (<—–ask that) Try to refresh his memory. you don’t have to do anything more than what you’re already doing which is enough. Tell him to forget about all those worthless girls.The past does not always reflect the future; ask him if he wants to forget about them. Also he might need some help (not just from you) because abuse of any kind can affect an individual.

  • sabina_kelly:

    you need to show him that your faithful. if he has had bead relationships in the past and people hurt him it’s no wonder he has trust issues. just make him feel comfortable. tell him how you feel without making him feel uneasy. trust me it’s those little things like a cuddle or a kiss that really turn your guy on. don’t rush things though. things like love take time :)

  • fypnlp:

    Aside from verbally showing it, simply show it to him physically and with an emotional attached into it. In short, never fail to make him feel everyday how much you care, trust, and love him unconditionally.

  • Jenny:

    the only thing you can do to make him see your love is to ACT loving. words obviously hold little clout to this guy (it sounds like women who have hurt him in the past were probably “all talk”).
    so don’t bother trying to convince him with your words. it’s the things like giving him the bigger piece of cake, rubbing his back, bringing him home a neat leaf you found on the road that add up and paint a picture of your love for him.
    actions speak louder than words, as the saying goes.

    and if he’s still insecure after a while, that’s okay. give him time. but DON’T let him start to use this “you don’t truly love me” thing as a way to manipulate you.

    if you think he’s milking this line, just tell him, “look, i love you, and i’m doing everything i can to show you. if you still doubt that, you’re just going to have to trust me.”

    trust is huge. trusting you can be HIS way of showing that HE loves YOU.

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